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Dock

Deep n' crisp n' even n' that!

Started this thread a couple of weeks ago but thought LD might beat me up at playtime for starting Christmas too early so I deleted it. But as itís one week to the 1st of December I now feel justified in posting it. Iíve already bought the majority of presents, cards to pick up this week from St. Gemmaís Charity Emporium, got my yearly bottle of single-malt ready to crack open, four doís noted on the calendar, need to buy a toy for the toy service at St. Matthews, and Dock Towers will be fully decorated by Evensong this Sunday. All going swimmingly so far. I love Christmas me!

*decks the halls*

*waits for Bearing to make his devastatingly funny joke about the decks the halls line*

Merry Christmas yer big bunch of Knackerknobs! That is all.
Grind

Not allowed until after Thanksgiving.

That is all.
Grind

Do you get all the Black Friday nonsense in the UK now?

Historically, at least, the Friday after Thanksgiving (i.e. the last Friday in November) is one of the (if not the actual?) best shopping days of the year with sales on almost everything. It is called Black Friday and the following Monday is called Cyber Monday (because similar crap then happens online - no useful work seems to get done in offices anyway).

I can understand why this is - and perhaps have a certain amount of sympathy for struggling retailers - kickstarting sales for Christmas (especially as the tax year here runs from January to December) and an excuse to flog as much shite as possible.

The problem I'm having is that now it seems completely acceptable for all the Black Friday deals bollocks to extend further and further back into November (it seems to have been happening for two weeks already) and, even the supposedly advert-free NPR station I listen to have been doing their "December to Remember" pledge crapola throughout November.

No. Fuck off.

Proper Thanksgiving is one of the few American traditions I think should be copied.

Basically it's meant to be a time where families are meant to get together and, well, give thanks for what they have and reconnect with each other. Sure, several million turkeys don't appreciate it much, but it's meant to be a mellow and contemplative time before the Christmas shenanigans begin.

This is no longer the case for many - what used to be a guaranteed day off (often Friday is/was too) is now turning into a rabid consumerthon - ordinary minimum wage shop workers are being told in no uncertain terms that they have to work on Thanksgiving because everybody needs to shop.

No. Fuck off.

Friday onwards? Maybe.

Before or especially on Thanksgiving?

No. Fuck off.
Grind

The other thing about these stupid sales is that, unless you really have to have something now, people deliberately put off buying big ticket items until Black Friday (or its now precursive cousins), which only further exacerbates the need to have the sales to make the yearly numbers.

There are several retailers here from which I would never buy anything at full price (e.g. Macy's) because they put everything on sale every other weekend.

Retail madness.
Plastic Man

Grind wrote:
The other thing about these stupid sales is that, unless you really have to have something now, people deliberately put off buying big ticket items until Black Friday (or its now precursive cousins), which only further exacerbates the need to have the sales to make the yearly numbers.


While inflation is commonly viewed as not being a good thing, deflation can be more detrimental to an economy.

People defer buying things on the assumption that they will be cheaper some time in the future.

And if prices are coming down, there is no need to increase wages...
Grind

Plastic Man wrote:
Grind wrote:
The other thing about these stupid sales is that, unless you really have to have something now, people deliberately put off buying big ticket items until Black Friday (or its now precursive cousins), which only further exacerbates the need to have the sales to make the yearly numbers.


While inflation is commonly viewed as not being a good thing, deflation can be more detrimental to an economy.

People defer buying things on the assumption that they will be cheaper some time in the future.

And if prices are coming down, there is no need to increase wages...


It all went tits up when they allowed Sunday trading.

Therefore it's God's fault.

* What next? Easter in February?
Frazier Cranium

Easter probably IS in February if you ask the kids, gazing and salivating at all the Easter eggs for sale at the same time as that other religious occasion, not, VD.
Dock

Good to see you're all entering into the festive spirit. Curmudgeonly Feckers!
Frazier Cranium

Yeah come on, it is November after all.
Dock

Frazier Cranium wrote:
Yeah come on, it is November after all.


Not for long. Soon be December.
Frazier Cranium

Yes, well spotted  And in DECEMBER I will then prepare to try and enjoy all the Goodwill To All Men commercial event called Christmas
Dock

Frazier Cranium wrote:
Yes, well spotted †And in DECEMBER I will then prepare to try and enjoy all the Goodwill To All Men commercial event called Christmas


Look pal this isnít a threat but Iím making a list, and Iím checking it twice, trying to find out whoís naughty or nice and all Iím saying is youíll be lucky if you even get is a smack in the lug if this kind of apathy escalates. Iíll tell Santa. Just see if I donít.
Frazier Cranium

I AM SANTA, fucktard.
Dock

Frazier Cranium wrote:
I AM SANTA, fucktard.


Gaspar, Balthasar, and Melchior were three wise men as far as I know. Don't remember one called Fucktard. I could be wrong like.

As for Santa living in South Leeds? Total rhubarb. The only similarities with the North Pole and South Leeds are that they are both dark and frozen wastelands with little, if any, civilisation. The North Pole has all the toys and elves, and South Leeds just has old mattresses in the street and urchins.
Grind

Wise men?

What kid wants gold, let alone Frankincense or myrrh when they could get an ace pair of Nike toddle-trainers?
Grind

At Black Friday prices, natch.
Grind

You'll be glad I didn't do an inappropriate "King of the Jews" joke when mentioning the gold.
Grind

* Gets smited *
Grind

Or semited?
Grind

* Has to celebrate Kwanza instead. *
Grind

Too soon?
Dalek

Frazier Cranium wrote:
I AM SANTA, fucktard.


No - I'm Santa!  
Late Doors

Re: Deep n' crisp n' even n' that!

Dock wrote:
Started this thread a couple of weeks ago but thought LD might beat me up at playtime for starting Christmas too early so I deleted it. But as itís one week to the 1st of December I now feel justified in posting it. Iíve already bought the majority of presents, cards to pick up this week from St. Gemmaís Charity Emporium, got my yearly bottle of single-malt ready to crack open, four doís noted on the calendar, need to buy a toy for the toy service at St. Matthews, and Dock Towers will be fully decorated by Evensong this Sunday. All going swimmingly so far. I love Christmas me!

*decks the halls*

*waits for Bearing to make his devastatingly funny joke about the decks the halls line*

Merry Christmas yer big bunch of Knackerknobs! That is all.


Aah go on then you impatient scamp, there's always got to be one eager young soldier fires the first shot and one brave warrior first into the charge

No one stopping with us this year and we ain't going anywhere, just us two. Much as i love the in laws clan im looking forward to it that way. They have the Belfast mob over in Edinburgh and we really didn't fancy that at all. With you all the way, its a great time of year with lots to enjoy. Not just a hedonist fest either, despite the festivities its a great time for reflection and assessment of what's important especially as another year rolls away. Nice drop of malt helps as well.
Late Doors

Grind wrote:

Proper Thanksgiving is one of the few American traditions I think should be copied.

    tell you what....  you fuck off  

I guess the thing with rampant consumerism rammed down your throat is that no one is actually making you buy the shit and its a choice (to buy, not to work when you can get it, well i suppose that is as well...). You can't stop it by banning trade, well you could but i guess the free market warriors might have something to say about that
Grind

* Fucks off *

** Buys turkey anyway. **

Christmas is all about Thanksrececeiving anyway.

It's not the Christmas pasts or Christmas futures that count. No Siree, it's the Christmas presents.
Grind

You have to ask yourself, "What would the baby Jesus want?"

* Bitty. *
Dock

Re: Deep n' crisp n' even n' that!

Late Doors wrote:
Dock wrote:
Started this thread a couple of weeks ago but thought LD might beat me up at playtime for starting Christmas too early so I deleted it. But as itís one week to the 1st of December I now feel justified in posting it. Iíve already bought the majority of presents, cards to pick up this week from St. Gemmaís Charity Emporium, got my yearly bottle of single-malt ready to crack open, four doís noted on the calendar, need to buy a toy for the toy service at St. Matthews, and Dock Towers will be fully decorated by Evensong this Sunday. All going swimmingly so far. I love Christmas me!

*decks the halls*

*waits for Bearing to make his devastatingly funny joke about the decks the halls line*

Merry Christmas yer big bunch of Knackerknobs! That is all.


Aah go on then you impatient scamp, there's always got to be one eager young soldier fires the first shot and one brave warrior first into the charge

No one stopping with us this year and we ain't going anywhere, just us two. Much as i love the in laws clan im looking forward to it that way. They have the Belfast mob over in Edinburgh and we really didn't fancy that at all. With you all the way, its a great time of year with lots to enjoy. Not just a hedonist fest either, despite the festivities its a great time for reflection and assessment of what's important especially as another year rolls away. Nice drop of malt helps as well.


We are having a quiet Christmas Day as well. seems to have become tradition since Joseph came along. Just us three and the dog. All the extended family stuff is for other days. I agree about the time for reflection. If I analysed it enough that last point and spending time with Joseph and Mrs. D are probably the main reasons why I look forward to this time of year. Well, that and The King George VI Chase from Kempton on Boxing Day of course. Make sure you tune into CH4 so you don't miss all the action......I know you won't!
fartcatcher

As D1 and partner now have their own flat, I told her me and the mgmt were coming round there for Christmas. Response unprintable.
Dock

fartcatcher wrote:
As D1 and partner now have their own flat, I told her me and the mgmt were coming round there for Christmas. Response unprintable.


That's not very festive of her is it FC. All those Barbie dolls of yesteryear seem to have slipped her mind eh. Maybe you and mgmt should just turn up unexpected at 9am on Christmas morning and when she opens the door shout "Surprise!!!!!!".
Grind

Best. Present. Ever.
Dock

Grind wrote:
Best. Present. Ever.


Barbie?
Sir Bulldog Craggwood

I'm going to Kitzbuhel in Austria next weekend for a wedding - a lot of flipping snow there I tell thee.

And German Christmas Markets? I'll be shitting them mate
fartcatcher

Mate of mine had a full on rant about Xmas on Facebook. He's generally a quiet sort of a chap, so I think it took a few people by surprise

Quote:
LONG RANT ALERT. Lots of people recently have asked me why I don't like Christmas. That's not strictly true - I just don't like what Christmas now stands for. Leaving aside any religious aspects, because those of you who know me will know that I don't care one jot about those, I thought that the 12 days of Christmas were supposed to last from 25th December to 5th January. Instead, we have shitty Christmas music, cheapo tinsel and plastic trees rammed down our throats by the retailers any time from the end of August, but this disappears without a trace straight after Boxing Day.

Christmas is not about putting yourself in debt buying tat that you can't afford for people who neither wanted nor needed it. Sending cards with generic messages in envelopes with mail-merged labels doesn't show that you care. Killing yourself fighting in crowds in supermarkets over a 'discounted' TV shows only how disgustingly selfish Joe Public really is. Exhausting yourself driving hundreds of miles around the country to put in a 30 minute appearance at every distant relative you can think of in the space of 48 hours doesn't really benefit anyone.

People ask me what I want for Christmas. I genuinely struggle with this. By any standards, I consider myself extremely lucky and fortunate. I have a fantastic job, a nice house, an awesome wife and a gorgeous little1 year old son, and I genuinely want for nothing else. If anything, the only things that I truly want in addition to this are the things that nobody can give me - a few friends of mine have been dealt a shit hand in life this year, and I hope that life swings the other way for them. Some people in my family suffer from poor health and are in extreme pain, and I truly want them to recover, but these aren't things that Christmas can do much about. I genuinely would not be offended or think any less of anyone if they didn't buy a present for me - quite the opposite in fact. Presents only distract me from spending more time with the people that I love.

To me, Christmas is not about the presents, the cards, the cheesy decorations or the dubious music, or even about the religion. It's about taking a couple of days out of your normal day to day life to sit back, let the world stop and relax with the people that you love, enjoy some nice food, some nice drink and to spend that rare quality time with them and to let them know how much they mean to you.

So, I don't hate Christmas, I just wish we could claim back its true meaning for ourselves without all the commercial crap that goes with it.

Rant over. Sorry everyone
Grind

It's hard not to agree with him though.
Grind

That said, his one year old will be ringing Child Services in a couple of years or so when he doesn't get his bike.

Oh yes he will.
Dock

fartcatcher wrote:
Mate of mine had a full on rant about Xmas on Facebook. He's generally a quiet sort of a chap, so I think it took a few people by surprise

Quote:
LONG RANT ALERT. Lots of people recently have asked me why I don't like Christmas. That's not strictly true - I just don't like what Christmas now stands for. Leaving aside any religious aspects, because those of you who know me will know that I don't care one jot about those, I thought that the 12 days of Christmas were supposed to last from 25th December to 5th January. Instead, we have shitty Christmas music, cheapo tinsel and plastic trees rammed down our throats by the retailers any time from the end of August, but this disappears without a trace straight after Boxing Day.

Christmas is not about putting yourself in debt buying tat that you can't afford for people who neither wanted nor needed it. Sending cards with generic messages in envelopes with mail-merged labels doesn't show that you care. Killing yourself fighting in crowds in supermarkets over a 'discounted' TV shows only how disgustingly selfish Joe Public really is. Exhausting yourself driving hundreds of miles around the country to put in a 30 minute appearance at every distant relative you can think of in the space of 48 hours doesn't really benefit anyone.

People ask me what I want for Christmas. I genuinely struggle with this. By any standards, I consider myself extremely lucky and fortunate. I have a fantastic job, a nice house, an awesome wife and a gorgeous little1 year old son, and I genuinely want for nothing else. If anything, the only things that I truly want in addition to this are the things that nobody can give me - a few friends of mine have been dealt a shit hand in life this year, and I hope that life swings the other way for them. Some people in my family suffer from poor health and are in extreme pain, and I truly want them to recover, but these aren't things that Christmas can do much about. I genuinely would not be offended or think any less of anyone if they didn't buy a present for me - quite the opposite in fact. Presents only distract me from spending more time with the people that I love.

To me, Christmas is not about the presents, the cards, the cheesy decorations or the dubious music, or even about the religion. It's about taking a couple of days out of your normal day to day life to sit back, let the world stop and relax with the people that you love, enjoy some nice food, some nice drink and to spend that rare quality time with them and to let them know how much they mean to you.

So, I don't hate Christmas, I just wish we could claim back its true meaning for ourselves without all the commercial crap that goes with it.

Rant over. Sorry everyone


Apart from you FC I find it hard to take anybody who chooses to be on Facebook very seriously. No offence to anyone but it's seems to me to be, in the main, gossip and shite. Facebook is a backward step in the progression of human communication if you ask me...............I know you won't. And I have a profound belief that history will prove me right.
Grind

It's called Faecesbook in this house.

Well, it is by one of us.
fartcatcher

I agree Facebook is mainly shite and am proud to say I play my part in that.

At the moment it is plagued by Facebook mums posting pictures of their little darlings dressed as shepherds in nativity plays, wearing a dressing gown, a teatowel on their head and carrying an oversized walking stick.

We've all seen it before thanks.

Still at least it's all written in English. Unlike #twitter#bollocks#shite
Grind

http://infolocata.com/mirovia/irrefutable-proof-that-santa-is-odin/
Dock

Eleven more sleeps. I'm so excited, that I just can't hide it. I'm about to lose control and I think I like it!
Grind

Saw the Boston Pops play here in Manchester last night - they did a pretty neat rendition of The Twelve Days of Christmas.

* Even Grind has to now grudgingly admit that it's beginning to look a lot like Christmas. *
fartcatcher

A festive tune from The Hives and Cyndi Lauper

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3KqSljlG4Qg

View on YouTube

embedding on Youtube buggered again. I used a catalytic converter
Grind

"Embedding buggered again I fear"

Catchy.

On a separate note, there's the very real possibility we won't have a white Christmas here as there isn't too much left on the ground now (only the stuff out of the way of the sun or the bigger of the banks made by snow plows (sic) remains).

The (shortly to arrive) nieces from Australia are going to be well pissed off.
fartcatcher

I've just found that converter so I'm going back to edit it.

And it's plough btw.

We are expecting a wet Christmas
Grind

fartcatcher wrote:
I've just found that converter so I'm going back to edit it.

And it's plough btw.

We are expecting a wet Christmas


I know, that's what the (sic) was for, numbnuts.
Grind

With nineteen and and twenty-one year old minxes in the house, I'm hoping it isn't going to be a moist Christmas here.

* Scared of New Hampshire. *
Grind

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b9TTz3R5SmI&app=desktop
Grind

I is too stupid to know how to do dat embed thing.
Grind

Grind

An old favourite......

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=af7LwnA913g
Grind

One for Butts?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=htYMI7_blhA
Grind

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Fe11OlMiz8&sns=fb&app=desktop

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